I have been thinking for the last ten minutes on how to write this post without complaining. I should learn to live through suffering and control my emotions.
Two events took place today (plus one small thing):
1.) I had an appointment with my psychologist and my mother. I have to learn how to deal with people pressuring me to do things I do not want to do, and learn how to build my relationship with my mother again.
2.) My mother and her boyfriend argued if they should take me to a friend's house on Tuesday. It ended up with me not been able to go (it's for a YFCI project) because I do not like my mother's boyfriend and now she is mad at me. Oh well, at least that's what she told me, I have never had the guts to reply to her :).
3.) On Msn, a friend said I did not like the prom because I am not attending the reunions I should, like yesterday and tonight. That is true. That is also why it is highly probable I will go to Cuzco (a tourist attraction in Peru I've never visited) instead of the prom. They may make me cry telling me I have 'shit on my brain' and that I should really go to the party, but I have to stick up to my decisions... And I have never done that.
I have been on the verge of tears earlier on today. But life for me is not that bad. True, I may lose all my friends from school. True, my mother has filled me with insecurities and made my home life living hell. However, I think I prefer that instead of dying of starvation in a deserted region somewhere isolated from the rest of the world :). So I appreciate that.
I love to take care of people and make them smile, even if my mother does not think the same way and wants more from me. I am quite a happy individual when she, or my prom, are not around. Maybe solitude has always been right for me :). Well, I have a lot to live and I will probably talk to my mother later...
I'll go read "The House of the Spirits". Have a good day everyone*!
Saturday, 1 December 2007
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8 comments:
I know that is hard, but try this out, it may help you
stand up to your mom! tell her what you feel! tell her " I don't like when you tell me to take care of you, and I don't like your bf!"
save your tears honey! this doesn't worth it! and you won't die in a deserted place alone, know why? cua you will have some others with you, know who? US! your friends! who will never leave you nor stop supporting you!
Smile honey, as you once told me :)
escucham si t entiendo victoria y en vrdd yo tmp es como si me sintiera muy agusto con la prom pero quizas lo disimulo bien .... si no te conectast con nosotros como otros lo hacen no es tu culpa tu simplemnte eres asi y no t preocupes cualquier cosa yo apoyo al 100% cada una de tus decisiones porque se que no las has tomado a la ligera y cada cosa que haces esta respaldado por un argumento valido si no quieres ir a la prom sera pues no lo hagas pero piensa bien las cosas si al final decides no hacerlo esta bien nadie te va a molestar y si alguien lo hace l saco la mierda...=) t quiero sonsa no t preocupes por nada y en cuanto a lo de tu mama yo tmp tengo el valor d enfrentar a la mia asi q somos dos hay q resolver q acer con ellas juntas :)!
m voy t adoro
pd: nunca me vas a perder me importas mucho como para q deje q nuestra amistad se kgue ..!
so ur not going eh?
good 4 u!!!
goin 2 a new place and all, remember Kevjumba's vid on peer pressure... u shud chk it out if u hvnt seen it already, it was about his friends pushing him 2 bleach his hair and hez like 'No , i won't do it, i won't give in 2 peer pressure, it's wrong' and then he took off his hat and showed us his bleached hair!
rily funny and wud make toi smile :)*
anyways have a blast and have a gr8 day sweetie ;)
lotsa luv
nah :P es q dicn q vaya la prom donde es un adorno +, es decir q vaya toa la gnt pero x q tienen q ir todos, no xq kieren estar cn todos xD La vdd es q t admiro dm, tienes el coraje d decir 'No kiero ir' mientras yo voy y m siento incómoda (pero m voy al tok :D jo jo jo)
No tienes mierda en el cerebro x no ir, d hecho q kieres a la gnt d tu prom pero no significa q por no reunirte con ellos seas un honguito antisocial. Eres d las personas q le gustan andar en grupos pequeños, de dos, tres o máximo 4 pero yo 100pre en los recreos veo q cuando estás en grupos muy grandes, generalmente te apegas a una persona. Es estilo d kda uno x) y no x eso significk q seas antisocial :S bueno, es el razonamiento d Solano (como wenazaaa 8-)
Si no puedes ir a mi ksa el Martes, veremos otra manera ;) dun worry, be happy, x último voy yo a tu ksa a invadir =) o si no kieres tener la presión d ksa, vámonos juntas a la plaza San Miguel a comer heladito :) c q tal vez no sea tn entretenida o buena como Camila pero iwal kiero q t sientas lo mejor posible! VIC! Hurra! *hace barritas* Hay q salir a la plaza San Miguel a comer Helados y Brownies! :D q día podrías?
q es google-talk? :S
kualkier hora :) kualkier día menos fines d semana (opio peeeeee caushita :O)
[Tengo que decirlo antes que nada: pusiste el asterisco en Leave school! yo quisiera hacer eso]
¿No vas a ir a la prom al final? Está bien. Cuando empecé a decir eso en mi colegio (lo organizan este año, aunque falta más de un año) y me tomaban como si estuviera loca. Pero está bien si no querés ir y te divertís de otra forma, tenés todathe bastards grind you down :)
Con respecto a lo de que no te dejan juntar para lo de YFCI, qué bronca! intentá después cuando esten más calmados, quizás tenían un problema a resolver en el momento en que vos hablaste.
Te quierooo :)
no vas a ir a la prom? =( no leí eso
ahora con kien voy a star? :'(
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